Writer's Block: DIY

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Several years ago, I was working as a sub-contracted courier, running hot-shot deliveries in my beat up '89 Ford Festiva. One summer day, I got sent on a 300-mile round trip, down to Green Bay and back, to pick up some computer parts.

Somewhere between Pembine and Wausaukee, it started to rain. I flicked my wipers on and nothing happened. Flicked 'em off; flicked 'em on. Nothing.

Shit.

I pulled into a little gas station and considered. Piled up against a crate of motor oil were some stacks of newspaper, tied up in twine. No one believes me, but I actually asked the guy behind the counter if I could take some of the twine from the newspaper bundles.

With two lengths of about 6 feet or so, I tied one piece to the top of each wiper, threaded the twine through the side windows and wrapped the right-wiper's twine in the right hand and the left-wiper's twine in my left hand.

As I went down the road, I steared with my knees and pulled the wiper's back and forth, zweep-zweep, zweep-zweep!

cac-1 requirments

( Just so I don't have to keep looking it up. )

heard at work

Me: (on the phone) ... Ok, Mom ... yeah, still no power... No, Mike'll be home tomorrow...

Deb: (after I hang up) You don't have power?

Ben: Didn't you hear the story?

Me: Well, we have heat, and just the lights in the kitchen. And the outlets in the upstairs bathroom; Sam has an orange extension cord coming out of the bathroom with a power strip on it for the computer and the Xbox, but all the stuff from my fridge are in the back of my car. Hmmm. I wonder if my chicken will thaw?

Ben: Good to know that Sam has his priorities straight.

Deb: Ew! Thawing chicken in the back of your car?

Ben: Deb has a serious germ phobia.

Me: (grinning) Really? Huh. That would set off your germ phobia?

Deb: Oh, yeah.

Me: Germs don't bother me much. I was one of the kids who would eat things for money.

Ben: You're still one of the kids who would eat things for money.