mother of the year
Aug. 21st, 2008 01:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ljgeoffYesterday, feeling kinda sick and headachy, I had a conversation with an irate parent. Seems that someone using my phone was talking to one of his kids about snorting Ritalin. After work, I had a conversation with the boys. Present were Sam, Fred, Justin, Brianna, and Dillon. It was about the house rules, and went something like this:
Me: Ok, everybody, what is the number one rule in this house?
Justin: No fighting?
Me: Nope.
Dillon: No getting in trouble?
Me: No, but closer.
Sam: No police.
Me: Bingo! The number one rule in this house is to not do things that will bring the police to my door. This means everything from being a general ass hole in town, breaking curfew, fighting, underage smoking and drinking, and anything involving drugs. Boys, I ask you, what happens when the cops have caught all of the crooks? (blank stares) ... Come on, think!
Justin: they need to keep finding crooks, so they can have a job.
Me: Ah! So, if there aren't any crooks? Let's say that you live in a small town, and there's just not that many crooks? What do you do?
Fred: I hate cops.
Sam: They would arrest more people for little stuff.
Me: Now, I ask you, what do the cops think about this house?
Everyone: ...oh, man,... drug house! ... if they only knew....
Me: Right! And why do people think this is a drug house? 'Cause it's got a bunch of weird looking kids, and the yard is always a wreck, and the house is always totally wasted. Obviously, we must be doing drugs.
Brianna: One of the cops told my Dad that this was a drug house. If they only knew ..
Me: And if they raided this place, what would they find?
Everybody: Geeks! ...D&D dice ... computer systems ... poo ... lot's of poo.... lot's of computer systems...
Justin: Cops get promoted and stuff, the more they arrest people.
Me: Indeed. Are cops interested in justice?
Sam: No.
Me: Right. Justice is not a cop's purview. Justice is the court's job. So, we have this system where we hire people to find crooks. They *have* to find crooks, or they loose their jobs. What happens if we don't have cops?
Dillon: Everyone is happy?
Me: No.
Sam: Anarchy!
Me: Warlords. Warlords with thugs.
Justin: Not so bad...
Me: if you are a Warlord.
Sam: Or the Warlord's thug.
Me: And if you're not the warlord or the warlord's thug?
Brianna: Not so good.
Me: Right. So, what have we learned from this little conversation?
Fred: I still hate cops.
Sam: But they're better than nothing.
Me: And what's the number one rule in this house?
Everyone: No cops!
Me: Now, let's have a conversation about recreational drugs. Does anyone know what the word "underclass" means? ....
Me: Ok, everybody, what is the number one rule in this house?
Justin: No fighting?
Me: Nope.
Dillon: No getting in trouble?
Me: No, but closer.
Sam: No police.
Me: Bingo! The number one rule in this house is to not do things that will bring the police to my door. This means everything from being a general ass hole in town, breaking curfew, fighting, underage smoking and drinking, and anything involving drugs. Boys, I ask you, what happens when the cops have caught all of the crooks? (blank stares) ... Come on, think!
Justin: they need to keep finding crooks, so they can have a job.
Me: Ah! So, if there aren't any crooks? Let's say that you live in a small town, and there's just not that many crooks? What do you do?
Fred: I hate cops.
Sam: They would arrest more people for little stuff.
Me: Now, I ask you, what do the cops think about this house?
Everyone: ...oh, man,... drug house! ... if they only knew....
Me: Right! And why do people think this is a drug house? 'Cause it's got a bunch of weird looking kids, and the yard is always a wreck, and the house is always totally wasted. Obviously, we must be doing drugs.
Brianna: One of the cops told my Dad that this was a drug house. If they only knew ..
Me: And if they raided this place, what would they find?
Everybody: Geeks! ...D&D dice ... computer systems ... poo ... lot's of poo.... lot's of computer systems...
Justin: Cops get promoted and stuff, the more they arrest people.
Me: Indeed. Are cops interested in justice?
Sam: No.
Me: Right. Justice is not a cop's purview. Justice is the court's job. So, we have this system where we hire people to find crooks. They *have* to find crooks, or they loose their jobs. What happens if we don't have cops?
Dillon: Everyone is happy?
Me: No.
Sam: Anarchy!
Me: Warlords. Warlords with thugs.
Justin: Not so bad...
Me: if you are a Warlord.
Sam: Or the Warlord's thug.
Me: And if you're not the warlord or the warlord's thug?
Brianna: Not so good.
Me: Right. So, what have we learned from this little conversation?
Fred: I still hate cops.
Sam: But they're better than nothing.
Me: And what's the number one rule in this house?
Everyone: No cops!
Me: Now, let's have a conversation about recreational drugs. Does anyone know what the word "underclass" means? ....
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(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-21 07:43 pm (UTC)Lisa that is too much. I'm going to make a 'Life of Lisa' Film. You're damn brilliant!
*lol*
oh, we love you!
I really, really couldn't have done a better job. I'll be taking a page from you...
That had just *got* to be in a movie...
(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-22 12:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-22 04:27 am (UTC)(But not in that creepy way where I come and boil your pets or anything.)
(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-22 11:09 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-26 11:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-09 09:37 pm (UTC)Nice explanation Lisa!
Going to Vikings with the rest of the UP crew?
-Andrew
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-10 04:29 pm (UTC)